Friday, March 5, 2010

You gotta have heart!

Just sitting in my office this morning thinking about all the things I've had a "heart" for...Wow! The list could go on and on...From toys, to boys, to clothes, and friends, and family, and places, and things, and of course my Savior! We start out at a young age and naturally have a heart for certain things...I remember really enjoying singing. In fact, while watching t.v., I used to sing every commercial between shows~you know that had to be annoying! ha,ha! I also had a heart for people, I remember at a young age sitting in the backseat when my Dad was driving & passing people on the street that looked sad and it would make me cry! I enjoyed playing Ms. Pacman and playing "school". I also liked to preach and even made a tape! ha,ha!!
These "passions" of our heart never go away!!! If we are encouraged and those things are noticed then we have a good chance at being fulfilled in life. However, if these things are made fun of, overlooked, or rejected then we will wander away from them and end up doing things that are totally meaningless to us! Some people will be strong enough and courageous enough to find their way back to those passions. Some will live a resentful life and live day in and day out doing things they can "accept" but not "cherish" and talk themselves into believing everything's okay....
I've never been one that has been satisfied with "okay"...I have always wanted to be true to the passions and purposes God has placed inside of me but sometimes because of the way things have turned out in my life (things out of my control) I learned it was easier to NOT fight and just settle!!! Even though it's NOT at all what I wanted to do! What do you do when that passion is so strong in you but you just don't know how to MAKE it a reality??? When I get really ANGRY, I can make a change! But how do you make that change last? How do you stick to something when you haven't had a lot of support in the first place....I know, give up!!! ha,ha! I truly do believe if you have HEART you can accomplish what it is you have a heart for! I know a TON of people that have settled...but know very few that have actually accomplished what they have desired out of life....My cousin recently started going back to school to be a hair stylist & I'm so proud of her because that is something she has LOVED her whole life & so for her to find her passion even in her 30's is so AWESOME to me!!! God puts those things inside of us~ there's no telling how many people she can minister to while she's cutting their hair, if she so chooses!!!
Lately, I've had the opportunity to be using my voice at church...I feel so blessed and privileged every time, but I also get nervous b/c of those old "tapes" that play in the back of my mind where I remember being criticized for not being "confident" enough...It's so funny though-how could I have been confident? What was invested in me to make me confident? Voice lessons? NO, Security? NO a Role Model (like a Mom?) NO, a stage? NO...See~ this is where the resentment can come in.....BUT I refuse to let that dictate who I am or what I will become for Jesus Christ!!!! I will continue to get up and sing ANYWAY!!! After all these years of singing those tapes are wearing out though and barely work anymore....Praise God!!!
What do you need to do with your heart today? I say, FOLLOW IT!!!!! I don't care how old or young you may be, how secure or insecure you are....There will always be excuses or lies for you to believe! Live your life on purpose today & with courage! God will order your steps as you are seeking Him and trusting Him!
Deuteronomy 30:16-18
"For I command You today to love the Lord your God, to walk in His ways, and to keep His commands, decrees, and laws; then You will live and increase and the Lord your God will bless You in the land you are entering to possess. But if your heart turns away and you are disobedient, and if you are drawn away to bow down to other gods and worship them, I declare to you this day that you will certainly be destroyed. You will not live long in the land you are crossing the Jordan to enter and possess."
Just like He just ordered my steps by leading me to that verse!!! YAY!!! I get it....I am being COMMANDED to LOVE MY GOD and OBEY HIM-(his laws which are clear in His Word) BUT if my HEART is drawn to other gods (which can be people pleasing/status/accomplishments/education/money/ANYTHING other than Jesus Christ etc...etc...) and I choose to BOW DOWN to them than I am NOT BOWING DOWN TO GOD...because I CAN'T bow down to BOTH!!! Some PEOPLE want to be like little "mini-God's", they want to control others, get their own way, & have you bow down to them~ It is Vanity. Solomon talks about that in Proverbs and how the wayward women is so smooth and her words drip with honey but where does she lead a man? To Death! We can not continue to be "drawn in" by these type of "idols" in our life that are so smooth!!! I do NOT want to be destroyed, do you? My life has been destroyed enough because I didn't have enough HEART to stay away from Idols! If someone is smooth talking~ stay away from them!!!!
This verse is my new verse to live by: Isaiah 57:13 "When you cry out for help, let your COLLECTION OF IDOLS save you! The wind will carry all of them off, a mere breath will blow them away. BUT the man who makes ME his refuge will inherit the land and possess my holy mountain."
I've been there, I thought my little collection of idols could save me~ but guess what? They couldn' be honest, as I look back over my life, I can see how the Lord has guided me & how He was proving to me that HE ALONE was my REFUGE....and let me tell you, (WITH CONFIDENCE!!!!) HE is enough! I sooo love my Jesus-He is not like any man I've ever known!
Prov. 4:23 "Above all else, guard your heart, for it is the WELLSPRING of Life"
I love you too~whoever you are reading this today!!!